Friday, September 4, 2009

We're here, because we're here

Oh wow. Oh wow. Oh wow.

So totally WOW.

Hello all you non-existent fools. I am finally at Brandeis...well, have been so for about two weeks and change but that is neither here nor there.

I think I'm in love.

I'm still getting used to this whole independence thing, and it is just awesome. For one, the floor I live on (Deroy 300) is awesome. The ration is 6 girls, 16 guys- and a few of them grace us with shirtlessness at least once a day. This is a good thing...on the most part. The guys are all pretty chill, as are the six girls. I like my roommate, she is a sweetheart if a bit confused sometimes.

My classes are also looking to be really fun. That is pretty good. I am taking American Legal History I, Intro to Antrho, Intro to Econ and a writing course about dramas with insanity in them. Its all pretty chill.

The guys on my hall are great. We have been having movie nights and there are only a few people who always keep their doors closed. I think they will join in on the fun once the month is out.

The funny part about being here is that next week I will be home again for the holidays. go figure. I hope I don't get bombarded too badly with too many "OH MY GOD HOW IS COLLEGE!?" From my many jewish relatives. I think I will spend a lot of time hiding in my room or something.

The one bad thing about college is that I have found new ways to procrastinate. Such as Fuck FML, this place is awesome xD I never knew there were so many people obsessed with dinosaurs, forts, and harry potter. Its kinda sorta very awesome.

I do have other things to do besides classes though! Shakespeare (Romeo and Juliet) and Mock Trial are the two clubs I've joined. Apparently both take up a lot of time-so that should be fun. right. I need to learn not to be a killin' myself over shiz.

And to the counter on the side of my page. I wanna know who the person was who kept pressing refresh for that long. There is NO way I got that many unique hits in one day, especially cause not one of ya left me a comment if that is true. It did almost make me choke on the Challah I was eatin though when I saw the number. I hope you enjoyed reading who ever you are. Comment! I don't bite.


Seriously. I hope you stop by again. Enjoy what I am saying or what not, cause that would be pretty cool. Not that my life is very interesting. Well, it can be-but I leave some of the more interesting bits to myself.


But for now, I must go. The Pizza delivery guy is here, and I am sick of Sherman food.


Sunday, August 16, 2009

Six days and Counting

Its funny how things work out sometimes.

Yesterday I just wanted to be social. It was 9:30 and I just wanted to talk to someone, get out of the house-just do /something/. But fates conspired against me and the people who I could normally call at 9:30 and say "hey, wanna go to Wendies" or "Wanna come help me walk my dog :D" Were either busy, or already at college. So I spent the night on my computer trying not to wallow in self-pity (Not entirely successful) and had a very lonely night.

Today, I feel a lot better emotionally-but Physically I'm eh. My back decided it wanted to belong to an old lady, so it hurts quite a bit and my wacked out sleep habits have caught up to me because I feel so very tired. I am waiting for like, 8:30 to come so I can just crash and sleep the whole night through. So of course, what happens?

I have about five people trying to make plans with me. I already went to the city to have lunch with my aunt and uncle, and now I am trying to figure out what I am doing now with people-or if i should just stay home. Someone upstairs is obviously having fun at my expense

Still, it could be worse. I only have six days left at home before I go off to fantasyland for four years. I hope I do well in school, and I hope I figure things out. I really really do. At the moment I want to major in some mix of Psychology, History, Business and Economics (in no particular order). I betcha in four years I am going to graduate with a Chemistry Major or something.

I need to go talk to m sister now about going to the mall. Apparently my wardrobe consists of no "party" clothes and that simply must be changed. Oh joy.

Still holding out for some questions :D


Friday, August 14, 2009


So I just got my new laptop!

It is sooooo pretty its almost insane xD.

I've named her Viola for the Twelfth Night Character, and my new ipod (yay rebates!) is to be named after the Duke. Nerd? You betcha!

My stomach just did this flippy turny thing. I can't believe I'm leaving for college in Nine days. Holy shit. Sorry, I just realized what a short amount of time that is.

Its weird... I'm not scared to go to college. I think Brandeis is going to be a really good fit for me, and I'm more than ready to be living on my own. I know I will be able to make friends (I have a few there already to fall back on :P) and my roommate seems to be pretty chill, which is always a good thing( lets hope I am saying the same thing three months from now, hmm?) and the work isn't really that intimidating (I took five APs this year and felt fine.) But, just because I am scared doesn't mean it isn't scary.

I still remember when my sister went off to college four years ago. We had just dropped her off the day before, and were back home. I was fourteen, sitting on my parent's bed as my mom talked about how much she was going to miss her. I remember smiling widely, and saying "You know, in four years /I/ will be going to college." just to push her buttons. She freaked a little and told me not to rush time away. I remember thinking that four years was a long time.

But now four years is up. I look back, and yeah-it was hella quick. It was only a year ago I was fuming about not knowing where I was going to go, and getting annoyed when people brought up the "college" conversation. I just hope the next four years go slowly. I don't want to grow up to quick. I have NO idea what I want to do when I "Grow up". But than again..four years ago, I didn't know what college I was going to either.

Time is a funny thing. Yup.

Well, I'm going to go finish cleaning my room (And by that I mean stall by playing Sims 3)


Saturday, June 20, 2009

OKAY. Maybe Three months from now....


this is like walking in late for a party that is being thrown for you WHOOPS
I mean, if anyone actually read this thing I would feel bad-but no one is-right?



At least I haven't abandoned this thing, I am going to try and get better at it especially because I have the whole summer ahead of me and not a lot to do. Rawr rawr rawr.

But for now:
I really have nothing to say except my stomach hurts and I have seen two movies twice in theatres, which I never do. Up made me cry both times (it reminds me of my pop pop) and Night at the was good the first time.

I love Moxy Fruvous. You should listen to them. seriously.

Aight. I'm out peps, erm-me. I WILL COME BACK SOON...maybe.

Questions anyone?


Sunday, April 12, 2009

Haha, Why yes. I do exist!

I don't know what to write.
Hello again! How ya! Long time no talk...been..golly. Two months, eh?
Three. Okay..well
better late than never I suppose.

I kept doing things and saying "hmmm...I should blog about this. I haven't written forever-than poof! I just didn't write about it. Don't ask me why I didn't, I just don't know. I want to get back on the ball again, get some focus back in my life and yeah. I just don't know quite where to begin right now. OH I KNOW

I am going to write about the amazing weekend I had last month with an old friend of mine to be known as Sunshine.

She and I go wayyyy back. We became friends in the summer of 2001, in Bonim bunk 13 (what what Eisner Camp). We were pretty close, I considered her one of my best friends, and our relationship was a bit on and off (as we had different groups of core friends). We had some pretty sick philosophical conversations though, and knowing her changed my life.

After the summer of 2006 though, we hardly spoke. We chatted occasionally through facebook, and I always told her I planned on kidnapping her one day...well two years later it kinda sorta happened.

She called me, and I took a train to new jersey to spend the weekend with her. It was amazing. We just talked about life, and walked around, and found sunshine and brown rice. We played apples to apples, did spinart, went to a coffee shop, made banana bread and was awesome.

It is always nice finding a new friend with an old friend.

Next time (Hopefully not three monthes from now) I will write about my weekend to Brandeis :)

I am now going to try and thrwart my bagel craving with Matzah. Yum.


Monday, January 26, 2009


I want to get this down before I forget.

Mexico was AWESOME

We went to Mazatlan for One week-and while it was a fucking hassle to get to. It was sooooo worth it.

Here was our agenda. Is it sad I remember the days by what meals we ate?

Left Kennedy for Houston. Turbulenceeeeee. Arrived after four hours, and got escorted around the city by my father's police friend Lyn. It...was well....Houston isn't much of a tourist place. It has the space center, and that's it. (We didn't even get to go). We had "Texas Bar-B-Que" and the BEST PECAN PIE EVER. We stayed at the Hampton Inn, and I got to listen to my sister gush on the phone to Joe for a bit. We acted like little kids (ice fights-hmm?) and got some sleep.

Left Houston. Two Hours on a smalll plane. Landed in Mexico. Got picked up by one of my parent's friend and got dropped off at Pueblo Bonito Emerald Bay. The Hotel was GORGEOUS. It was a bit rainy outside, and somewhat cool (Though nothing compared to New York. I would take "cold" Mexican Weather (68 degrees) ANY day of the year). Got a tour and went to our room. Same and I shared the couch bed-but for now I took a nap on the Veranda. Ate on Premises for Dinner. Surf and Turf and a really fun Appitizer boufet, and dessert boufet. ALso-discovered that I liked the 18 year old drinking age of mexico 8).

Still a bit rainy. Hung by the pool, went swimming, painted some cermaics and went to the Gym with my sister to work with a personel trainer. Napped and than went to the City for Dinner at a Resturaunt called Angelo's (Yes. Italian food in Mexico. Go Figure). BEST MUSHROOM SOUP EVER. They served in a bread bowl and everything. Also got to try spanish coffee, which is brandy(with most of the alcohol burned off), coffee, and vanilla ice cream. I liked it a lot-and we got some fun "mustache" pictures.

Sunny! What did we do? Zip-lining through the Jungle yo! IT was at place called Huana Coa, and it was super fun-even if I did get stuck a couple times before they put "training wheels" on me. I still want to do it again though, cause it was awesommmeeee. I wasn't even afraid of the heights :) After playing Tarzan, we went to a Tequilla Factory and saw how it was made. I had my first shot ever (Lick, sip, suck) and than we went back to the hotel. We ate dinner at El Capitanos, and we saw my father on TV because he donated Vests for the Police there. It was super fun.

We went on a city tour today. We saw the cliff divers, the Cathedrial (Super pretty), and we went shopping at the market. We had lunch, saw the opera house, and so much more. I got to test out my bargaining skills (Super awesome), and we were introduced to Olas Atlas.


Not only was the food amazing, but the family who runs it was super, super nice. We ended up meeting them three more times-and I swear it feels like I have known them my whole entire life. Kenn is an AMAZING chef, and I can't wait for them to come up to New York.
They even showed us this AMAZING massage place, which gave me the best massage I have ever had-for twenty dollars an Hour. Sick right? So much fun.

Breakfast at Olas Atlas<3 with the Police Secratery (Dad again :P) where my sister got one of the waiters to escort us to clubs later that night xD. My parents and sister went horseback riding and I went to the gym again (oh boy). Later that Night we went to Senor Peppers (eh) and than Sam, Marco, and I went to Joe's Oyster club and Bora Bora. We saw a fire spitter, drank, and had a whollllle lot of fun :). Came back at 2 am. Haha. whooopsss

Another Lounge day. Sam Got her tan, I got a burn, and my Dad decided to disguise himself as a lobster. We got another massage, hung out at Olas Atlas again and had a fun relaxing day. I realized I had to go back to school soon and was very sad.

Flew from Mazatlan to Houston. HOLY HELL. We had a police officer escort us from plane to gate( My darling Father yet again) and got through security and customs in THIRTY MINUTES. Plus we got a cart ride :P. It was pretty sweet. Next came the flight back to New York, trudging through snow, and than back to Home-and Bed. School the next day-where Mexico was but a dream.

I can't wait to go back.


Wednesday, January 14, 2009


Something happened yesterday that shook me to the core. I need to talk about it, do something about it, scream about it, I don't know. Don't know how I should act or feel. I've gone numb, I've gone Cliche. I don't know. I just don't fucking know.

A girl from my school killed herself yesterday. She was Junior, 16 years old. Was bright, sweet, a great writer and had such a future laid out for her. Sure she had her faults, we all do, but it is hard to remember them now. Hard to think she threw herself in front of a train to escape...something.

I have never known anyone my age who died. Either by accident or on purpose. It is a blow, right to the gut. Its kinda horrible, because I wish it was just someone who "I went to school with" maybe saw in the halls every once in a while. So the shock could pass and I could just let it go. Someone my age killed themselves. Shit, ain't that sad. I hope her friends are alright, I guess I should offer condolences and such. It is horrible to wish that, I know. But I do. I do.

I knew her though. We had gotten close her first year in school. I showed her some of my writing, and she showed me some of hers. I met her dog, her mom drove me home from drama, we laughed and she lent me a favorite book of hers. I gave her one of mine. She lost it. I was supposed to give her a mix CD. I don't know if I remembered to or not. I think I did-but I don't know. I don't know. Stupid memories keep popping up. Two years ago. She reviewed two of my stories, said they were good. She wrote a one act about a boy who died and a drug addiction. It was amazing. I was jealous of it, but I gave her tips. I wonder where it is now. I wonder why the only times I had spoken to her was to say hi, or to ask about the seventeen dollars she owed me. I wonder if she realized I was joking. Or half joking.

I'm mad.
At people for talking shit about her, for blowing things out of proportion and for making me think twice about being friends with her.
I am mad at myself for letting myself be swayed, that I didn't try to be friends with her again, that I didn't care enough. I'm mad at hindsight.
I am also mad at her. Shes such a fucking idiot. Didn't she realize how many people loved her? The talent she had? The potential? The light? God damn it. Didn't she realize it was final? Yes her parents were fucking crazy, but she only had two more years in college and friend's houses to escape too. She is such an idiot. Such a fucking idiot. God damn it! I don't know. I still haven't gotten my head around the whole "gone" concept. No more coming back. She didn't just leave for another school again. She is gone.

I don't deal well with emotion. I never have. I don't cry in public, and I often feeel detached an awkward. But hell? who doesn't. I also keep what ifing myself to death. I know it is no use, and I am trying to stop. But there it is:
What if
What if
What if

And I don't know. Don't know.
Life was so much nicer two days ago. Hopefully it will get better again. it always does. This too Shall pass. It is a pity she didn't see it.

R.I.P LS. You will be sorely missed, by more people than you know. I'm getting "The Perks of being a Wall Flower." and I am sending it around in your memory. So people can love it as you did.

Next post will be about happier times I hope. I was in mexico last week, I'll write about it when I feel better.
So yeah.